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2021 - Annual Visit with the Graduates of St. Francis High School

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It's become a tradition for me to revisit my alma mater - St. Francis High School in La Canada - and present for you the graduation address from school Principal, Thomas Moran.  I have always found his words to be insightful and inspiring, and so I wish to share them with you...

Mr. Moran's Address to the Graduates of the Class of 2021: 

A journalist was interviewing an 80-year-old woman, a three-time widow, about to be married for the fourth time. He asked about her life, her husbands, and their careers.

She paused reflectively for a few moments. A smile gradually came to her face and she answered proudly, explaining that she had married a banker in her twenties, an actor in her forties, a minister in her sixties, and now - in her eighties - a funeral director.

The interviewer looked at her, quite astonished, wondering how she had married men with such diverse professions.  With a gleam in her eye, she explained, "It was one for the money, two for the show, three to get ready, and four to go."

This fictional account is about more than a clever punchline, it’s an allegory about perseverance, resilience, and responding to loss.  We have all suffered from a profound sense of loss over the past year, perhaps the greatest in our lifetimes.  It may have contributed to feelings of depression, anger, and doubt. 

Inexplicably, as things we did not always appreciate were taken away, we began to value them even more.  Some were incredibly significant: family, friends, freedom, and fun.  Others did not seem that important previously, but we discovered that we missed those too.  Some personalized the loss for its individual impact, not comprehending its global implications.  And others endured agonizing isolation.  Helen Keller wrote:  "We bereaved are not alone. We belong to the largest company in all the world—the company of those who have known suffering."

So, tonight, don’t just celebrate your achievements, but your ability to overcome challenges. Consider focusing not only on what you have lost, but what you have gained.  Byron Katie tells us counterintuitively: “The worst loss you’ve ever experienced is the greatest gift you can have.” 

That quote is reminiscent of Franciscan spirituality.  The same kind of contradiction implied in “it is in giving that we receive,” is echoed in philosopher Arthur Schopenhauer’s comment: “Loss teaches us about the worth of things.”  To understand that, we need to practice acceptance, the first virtue of this unusual school year.  To implement it fully we need to employ service, generosity, and peacemaking- this year’s other virtues.  

That lengthy separation from your brothers has helped you to comprehend another important aspect of a Franciscan Education:  brotherhood.  Watching you “Re-U-Knight” after thirteen months apart was a powerful lesson in that virtue.  Remember that as you prepare for another separation, when you move into colleges across the nation. 

Theologian C.S. Lewis said: “We must stop regarding unpleasant or unexpected things as interruptions of real life.  The truth is that interruptions are real life.” So give yourself the grace to reflect and discover the blessings obtained from confronting adversity and triumphing over it.  Make it a transformational experience rather than a tragic one.  We may have lost some secular opportunities.  But, like that 80 year-old widow, we have gained more spiritual gifts to sustain us: hope, patience, perspective, compassion, and faith.

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